how teacher survive another day

i know it's lame when it comes to me, telling stories about what's going on, here and there. boring or not, who cares. i'm gonna share what i've been through so far, as a teacher.

dealing with this class of year 3, of which the teachers akan salute kalau boleh bagi senyap even for just a minute, have made me realize, i've got so many things to learn.

the very first approach used; bila tengok budak budak ni cikgu cikgu pun dah takdak harapan, "Korang nak main? Haaa, mainlah, ikut suka hati la nak buat ape, janji jangan bertumbuk, jangan buat kes disiplin. Itu je." and i still have that hope, yang diorang ni need a different approach. i call it 'kasih sayang'. so i end up guna approach lembut, panggil nama sorang sorang, try to remain cool the whole lesson tanpa naik suara. i even promise them weekly rewards (like chocolate bars, candies) sebagai token kalau diorang berjaya keep themselves behave and focused, up to my expectations. (well, these kids, i can't expect a drastic change, just pelan pelan, at slow pace, janji diorang willing untuk try)

the next thing i do, if the first approach tak berkesan, is i try to put myself in their shoes. thinking that they might get bored, trying to focus on the lesson one after another, i'll make sure ada short games or attention-seeking game. lagipun, diorang pun manusia biasa, they need to feel the fun in learning, they have to enjoy their language lesson, or else there's no point putting up such a well-planned lesson plan, trust me. so for me, i introduce this one game called Freeze! Melt! alaaa, game dulu dulu jadi beku pastu cair tuuu. easy, explain the rules, and start playing! i even try using this game waktu diorang bising yang tak dapat control, when i say Freeze!, they all go freezing. and that's the best time i give the next instruction, for example "Okay, lepas ticer cakap Melt!, ticer nak semua orang balik tempat masing masing, okay?" and it work, so far :)

and the last, final thing i would do (especially bila kelas dah out of control and i can't scream anymore, nobody's gonna hear me anyway) is psycho-ing. this approach, i can't predict the outcomes, but so far they all turn to angels when i do this :p well at least for the first ten minutes, listening to me nagging. i don't want to call it nagging, but sounds like it. i just knew i had this hidden talent of psycho-ing the kids spontaneously! standard ayat eh... banyak.

"Kamu nak jadi apa? Pilot? Kamu ingat pilot ni terbang dalam negara je? Kalau tak reti BI, pilot nak cakap bahasa apa? Bahasa Tamil?"
"Ayah kamu keje ape? Nelayan? Mak? Tak keje? Habis? Kamu datang sekolah, mak ayah kamu ingat kamu belajar. Penat penat dia pegi laut tangkap ikan, kamu boleh main macamni? Kamu ni sayang ke tak kat mak ayah ni? Hah?"
"Belajar nombor waktu bila? 6 tahun? Habis sekarang kalau ticer suruh eja, reti? 3 tahun kamu belajar nombor, apa yang kamu buat? Eja nombor one, two three tak tahu. Nak jawab apa exam?"
"Ni ticer nak mintak tolong. Dengaq elok elok. TICER YANG MINTAK TOLONG HANGPA NI. TOLONG NAH, tolong hafal ejaan nombor ni. Selalu anak murid mintak tolong cikgu. Ni cikgu mintak tolong anak murid. Tolong sangat sangat, ticer mintak tolong sangat sangat nih."
"Kamu bukan tak pandai. Allah bagi otak kat semua orang, bukan saja saja Dia bagi. Guna! Sebab tu mai sekolah. Sebab nak belajaq. Main boleh, tapi belajaq pun kena mau jugak. Pikiaq!"

to be honest, banyak lagi sebenarnya. but these are just few.

seriously, i don't have the intention nak torture, abuse or anything that has to do dengan kes sekarang. i need to do this to you kids, because i love you at the first sight. orang lain mungkin fikir you're a burden to the society, besar besar nanti these are the people yang akan jadi penganggur, penyangak etc. i want to change that sceptical mind about you, kids. i know, each and every of you have your own potentials. you're the only hope we have for a better future generation.

i have a lot more to say, kids. but my eyes wont let me stay too long here, my left leg gets cramped too often lately (pressing the clutch at its best) and fever is coming for a visit. i guess it's time for bed, teacher. waktu tertidur teacher sekarang ni, sekian berita dunia guru melaporkan.